ezioh! laauwwng tiem no see! hau's it goeing, fratello? :DD
◥		mohawktriberepresent

Deer mohawktriberepresent,

Et has a been going very weull considering I haf nawt compleetly lawst all of de bones in my hand!.. Frum teeching Duccio a lesson about coming bauck to my seester’s house! Dat beetch tried to hook up again…will he ever stawp? Maybe joo can help me…Do I haf to throw him in a well? DROWN HEEM? GASUP no..no…eet is a to much….besides i do a not know ef i could carry hees fat ass to da water…

I guess he will a stay faut forever, cause he shore does love to eat my knuckle sandweeches.

STAY FAT, DUCCIO!

Luff, Ezio

i challenge you to a children's card game
◥		togamilicious

“Deer togamilicious,

Wat kind of cheeldren’s caurd gaume? Laust tiem we plaide a caurd game, Yusuf aund I  sumhaow endeud up in a nakeed in da strueets.

Et was not bene.

Sincerely da assassen,

Ezioh”

Bewbs git in da way sumtimes or da ded

“Deer Seestur,

I aum a so esawree dat I hauv nawt been been abul to write to joo in quiet sum tiem. Since I hauf been destractud be mai luff’s bewbs, becoz dey so big.

Aund bounci.

Wait wai am I telling joo dis again? I should be telling dis to Yusuf oh wait… I caun’t.

Sincerely da Assassen,

Ezio”

Last Noche

“Deer Seestur,

Yesturdai I… Wait un secundo, what deed I do yesterday? I woke up next to dis laydee. baut who es she? Why es Yusuf on da floor? I dink sumthing went douwn laust noche and I do nawt remembur a ding.

Wat deed I do?

Sincerely da Assassen,

Ezioh”

Dear Ezio, how is life now that you are in retirement? Do you miss the daily mentoring duties, or are you pleased that you get to hang out with Sofia more often? Much love xx
◥		guardedbytheangels

Deer aussieshadowhunter,

Life es good, and peacful..it’s very nice for a chaunge of pace of cartwheeling off of duh roofs and keeli- NO

ET SUCKS.

SOPHEEUH DUN LET ME CHOKE DE GUARDS.

She say, she say ‘ooohhhhhhhh…no no es not good to do dat no more, since u retirued it meens u don’t doo joor job no more’

Mios Dios. Dis can’t be da trufs. She lie to me i just a know et. 

Maybe she lie cus she want more time with Big Papa Ezio

But yes, I do enjoy spendin de times with Sopheeuh, but i steel sneek around and boss de baby novices around.

Luff, Ezioh

Caun I git sum ear plaugs?

“Deer Seestur,

So dis weekund I deecided to spend da noche with Yusuf. Et was fun, we did da dings you might do at a frends hause. Shaurpen blades, taulk about da revolushun, not to mention bewbies. As we grew tirud, Yusuf put me in da rewm next to hees. Et was a nawt baud, a littul cold but I din mention da wurst part. I HEAURD YUSUF AND SUM WOMAN IN DA ROOM NEXT TO ME. SHE KEPT SAYIN HIS NAME.

Et should have been MY name she was a saying.

Sincerely da assassen,

Ezioh”